A short anthology of absurdity

The world is a joke so we may as well laugh at it.

This week, Elon Musk suggested he might buy budget airline, Ryanair, after getting into a spat with the company’s boss over access to Starlink. This may appear fanciful, but Ryanair would fit nicely next to X in Musk’s portfolio - both being constantly disappointing, with none of the features people want, and generally going nowhere.

Next week, Australia will celebrate its national day of arguing over its national day. Those who advocate for changing the date got an unlikely ally in anti-colonialism recently in, erm, Donald Trump. In a message to Norwegian Prime Minister Jonas Gahr Stoere about Greenland, the US President wrote “Why do they [Denmark] have a ‘right of ownership’ anyway? There are no written documents, it's only that a boat landed there hundreds of years ago.” Well, quite.

Despite all this, the biggest story of the past few days has undoubtedly been the Beckhams. Brooklyn Peltz Beckham’s attempt to make Instagram the new Substack with an 800 word post was the greatest example of ‘throwing your dad under the bus because you’ll never match his achievements’ since Prince Harry.

Speaking of the royals, Prince William recently declared his love for pubs and pledged to help the struggling industry bounce back. Unfortunately, he then completely trashed his reputation on this topic by ordering half a pint of cider.

One pub that could do with a helping hand right now is The Rec in Waroona, WA. Having advertised a ‘family fun day’, disappointed attendees turned up to find that none of the promised activity was actually happening. The venue was quick to issue an apology, admitting that “our staff [had] absolutely no knowledge of the advertised activities.” Which, in fairness, would present quite the challenge.